And Now She's 6!
LOOK AT THE TOES! Yikes!! They painted her toes with chocolate. The dog got them clean!
Eating her cake with her subjects - siblings.
It was a good day! . . .
but after we had the younger ones tucked in bed, including our birthday girl, several mentioned how they missed Matthew and another celebration he missed (though we know in our hearts his celebration is more splendorous in heaven). Norm & I did not bring it up, but we can tell their emotions and pain are still real, and in some ways just as raw. Jessica was the one who broke down the most . . .she's afraid of forgetting special memories of Matthew, she is sad that Bethany will not remember him, certain things around the house, outside, and even at the neighbors bothers her. She hates hearing the words "911" - and hates the sounds of sirens - though over the past months we have tried to tell the kids how it bothers us all, but to pray for the people they are going to help. She told me tonight how it was the first time she counted the days after Melody's birthday - and it's "only 5 days". Several of the children said, like Norm & I are feeling, that Saturday will almost be harder, as he died on a Saturday. So, we went through a fun day, and did spoil Melody maybe a little too much, but there's still the hurdle to get through. It's painful, and in someways, lonely, because few truly understand this deep grief & pain. Norm & I try to talk about things privately & Jessica was surprised tonight when I told her we think of Matthew everyday and talk about him everyday to each other. She thought it was "just her" hurting so much. She sobbed so hard. So once again, our hearts not only hurt for the child we miss, but for the ache we cannot heal in our children. Continue to keep us and esp. our children in your prayers.
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